Going back to school

Now that both the kids are in school full time ( 2 days), I've been busy as a beaver. I would like to say that I've spent it all in the studio but I haven't. I can easily see how the housework and errands can take up the entire day now that I don't have to worry about anyone else being bored with the tasks. I'm at the start of my work week so I will have to wait to get back in the studio again.

On Sunday's though I have started taking a Children's Book Illustration course at Emily Carr University and I'm hoping that the course will give me the confidence and push I need to approach publishers. For years I've said that I'm not ready or skilled enough to submit my work but that's just fear talking. My instructor, Lisa Cinar, graduated from Emily Carr ten years (!) after me which doesn't do much for my fear that I'm too old to pursue this career. Why have I waited so long and let so much time pass? I fear the rejection and the criticism. That I don't have what it takes. You can't fail if you don't try. I also fear that I may not enjoy the process of illustrating a book. Sometimes the fantasy is more enjoyable than the reality. But I really don't know the reality of being a children's book illustrator because I haven't done it. I do know that I have a deep affection for children's illustration and it's a genre I always come back to.
The truth is that I want my art to be in books that are cherished by children and fondly remembered by them when they are adults. I want my art to inspire future artists just like the illustrations that I loved and that spurred my desire to create.